Something I realised, after having to help many international tourists count out their change, is that American coins don’t actually have the number value on them??? Like no wonder all these poor tourists are so confused
it just fucking says one “dime”
what the fuck is a dime
how much is it worth
whose idea was this
oh my god i never even realized that what the hell we all just sort of know what they’re worth through some sixth sense bullshit
kissing is great
but wow when you get to kiss someone you have feelings for and you’ve wanted to kiss them for the longest time and you get to stroke their face and you’re so aware of their body and how nice their lips feel
hugging when two people have boobs is basically playing boob tetris.
every 1st september we joke about getting ready for hogwarts to cover up the very real and very very deep scars of never getting our letters
people who do the dishes without wearing gloves should be feared and will survive the apocalypse
People wear gloves?
yeah?? There’s special gloves for it???
what the fuck
what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?
one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails
if a girl asks you for a tampon, I dont care how much you hate that bitch if you have one you hand it over no one deserves that level of hell